wow valentine's day... exciting right? the time for boxes of chocolates and bunches of red roses... love is in the air. mushy movies and passionate offerings and speeches... and here's that day which has painted the whole town red... so...
HAPPY VALENTINE'S EVERYONE!!!

...

Many a things have caught my eye
In this world of mystery and satire.
Some for their shine and sheen
And some for their very lack of it all.
But one thing that would never
Go away from me
Would be the understanding
In that one smile.
She stood there
Waiting for whatever I'd to give;
Never expecting much;
Happy with what
I deemed to bestow on her.
She never did complain
Not when I opened my Pandora's box,
Or when I let out them hungry locusts on her.
She just took my hand,
Never leaving my side.
The girl stood there
Waiting for me
With that smile that
Never did snuff out on me.
I stand there grateful,
A bit sheepish, a weak little smile.
She still stands there waiting,
With that smile,
That I've fallen in love with...

locked in a photograph
looking at all peering in...
i stare, when you stare
and look
i am imprisoned
in my memories and mind
a photograph, blotchy,
blurred and sticking to the glass
my face plastered
my nose rubbed in the dirt
memories flood
and i drown
never fully sinking
always up till knee-high

...

It is winter all over again...
I am cold and blue.
The snow is no longer white
Harsh it is, muddied and brown.
A piece of that unholy mirror
Has pierced my heart...
I was mistaken.
It was not spring
It never was...
A twinkle blinds my eye again...
Tricking me once more.
I am back outside...
In the winter
In the cold
All alone...

trying to unwind,
moving out from the looming relentless fog...
standing in the darkness
i stand waiting to be unraveled.
tears; aren't they the best medicine?
frustrated, its all i count on.
letting my blood flow through these beads, the droplets..
a lump in my throat
for a reason i know not...
why won't it just go away...
why do i stand in the darkness
groping for something i don't know.
stupidity reaches new heights
as i solve my non-existent mystery
i am broken
for was i ever wild?
i am defeated
for did i ever struggle?

Not at my very best

Not at my very best,
I sigh.
To get myself back,
I try.
These fallen leaves
Are playing, dancing
And living their lives, their afterlives...
Oh they are running away from me.
The sands are slipping away;
The waters dripping away.
In self-pity, I am drowning,
To get myself back,
I try.
In the middle, in the eye
Of a whirlwind
I stand
Doing nothing,
Seeing all the world rewind.
My oh my
What have i gotten myself into,
Stagnant and numb
I stand
Doing nothing.
Watching houses, trees and lives fly,
I sigh.
Caught in its timeless moment
Stolen from me is a part of me
I stand
Doing nothing.
Not at my very best
I sigh...

Love to see you squirm

love to see you squirm;
the earthworm bitten by the ants
piece for piece in the sun...
in a mood to spit fire
all i see is the dark
your pain comes as the light
for i have been hurt
left there to turn,
grovel and shovel in that pain.
i am hence the sadist
but what of the pleasure you got
as i cowered and writhed
world has never doled you the judgment.
why is it a one sided business.
oh why am i always in the dark
in the wrong.
now i want to be in the light.
i want to be the one
to bask in the theater bright...
for once let me be the cruel one
wait, for once i am the cruel one...
for once i delight
in your candles getting out-puffed
oh! love to see you squirm...
Or maybe.. maybe not...