Death in any possible way is still death. Be it by a gruesome accident, or just by dying in your sleep. The ultimate is the same.

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Come on! How hard can it be to let go??? But then why can't I? Ugh!I'm supposed to, but how can I bring myself to severe something that means so much to me... Clutching my heart, hitching my breath, getting ready to say that ONE word- to free you and me! but then my steps falter... I find I'm not that sort of person. Me- I'm selfish, crude and horrible- I'm supposed to stop this, to break that circle of pain for you and for me... supposed to forget it was heaven when we were together.. to remember how the heaven became hell after a few days, a dream becoming a nightmare... to forget the heartache and move on.. to let you go. I can't. I can't come to terms that I'll no longer see you smile... to realise that the grimace on your face is because of me... that the clenched teeth and the tightened fists are because of me... . to imagine that the place where I belonged will no longer exist... to see that what we made together will lie shattered... just pieces of worthless spangles, wasted reminders of something precious... just glittering in the sun... letting everyone know that what we had now is no more...

I CANNOT THINK!!! My thinking process has died i suppose... a shock instilled shock? It's weird when you consider how a small thing can affect the human psych so easily and irrevocably. Well, as i said I cannot think, hence jumping through stuff... Life's unanswered questions- that's the human mind. You learn about one doesn't even mean you know the whole thing. Well, the more you try to understand it the further you are from ti.like bein closer to the church further from god???anyway forget it!fuck!who cares...